What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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