just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
