Can Purell be used as lube?
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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