New low: just hacked my moms facebook
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Randomize
