why didn't you poke me back
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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