so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
COCAINE IS GR8
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
