3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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