Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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