My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
