Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
