I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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