just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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