i permit you to call me
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
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