You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Randomize
