i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Randomize
