look no pants
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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