He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
