STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
