he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
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