I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize