your room smells of hookers.
And success
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Randomize
