worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
