my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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