honey bunches of taint.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I think people are normalizing furries
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
