I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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