I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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