i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
