Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Randomize
