I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
