maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Randomize
