Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Can Purell be used as lube?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
