we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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