We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Non-Jews are for practice
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
