There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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