you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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