Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Semen is not good for contacts.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
