Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
