sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
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