Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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