you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
