The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
