help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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