I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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