Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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