He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
