My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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