I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
