I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
