Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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