Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
