Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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